An eight-year-old Sheldon went into a grocery store and picked out a large box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over and asked Sheldon if he had a lot of laundry to do. "Oh, no laundry," Sheldon said, "I'm going to wash my dog." "But you shouldn't use this to wash your dog," said the grocer. "It's very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he'll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him."
      But Sheldon was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it. A week later, Sheldon was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked him how his dog was doing. "Oh, he died," Sheldon said. The grocer said he was sorry, but added, "I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog." "Well," Sheldon replied, "I don't think it was the detergent that killed him." "Oh? What was it then? "I think it was the spin cycle!"

A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver's window, he was astounded to find the driver, Leigh Kahn, behind the wheel knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "Pull over!" at the top of his lungs. "No!" Leigh Kahn yelled back, "Scarf!"

Doug Griffin walks into a bar with a giraffe and they proceed to get blitzed. The giraffe drinks so much it passes out on the floor. Doug gets up and heads for the door to leave when the bartender yells, "Hey! You can't leave that lyin' there!" Doug replies, "That's not a lion! It's a giraffe."

Cobus and Alec are in a bar watching the TV. There is a news report about a man who threatens to jump off a 5 story building unless the cops give him 3000 dollars. Cobus says to Alec: "I bet you 100 bucks the guy jumps". Alec takes the bet, and the guy on the TV ends up jumping. Alec hands over the R100, but Cobus gives it back, saying that he had already seen the guy jump on the earlier bulletin. Alec says "Well I saw it too but I didn't think he would jump again"